Tuesday, January 17, 2012

and so we said our goodbyes...

This past Sunday was our last day at our church. Were my step-grandfather preached for years and the entire church has known me since I was seven. Now my Uncle is the pastor and still it feels like home and it is hard to say goodbye. I have been going there for nearly 25 years, that's practically my entire life!

Why are we saying goodbye? Well, that wasn't an easy decision...

We had an urging a few months back but we figured that was just us and decided not to listen. Then the call became greater and even stronger. We decided to fast and pray. The entire month of October was devoted to this one question, "Lord, are we where you want us?" At the end of the month we looked at each other and hung our heads low because we knew the answer was to leave our church.

We were a little sad. It's not easy to leave a church to do God's will and have blind faith because you don't know where you will end up. It is very easy to leave a church when you are just leaving because of personal reasons. We had a ton of excuses why NOT to leave...

What about our pastor, or (insert name here)?

What about Little Buddy? We know making friends isn't easy...

What if?

and so they continued on and on. The more excuses we came up with as to why not to go the more "hurt" we became. Trust me we had a google of reasons why we shouldn't go...

Honestly, we becamea lot like Jonah. We were listening to our personal reasons and not to Him. Sometimes when you listen to reasoning and not God you begin to rebel. Not because you don't know better but because you don't fully understand why. We had began to be rebellious in our own hearts. We had to repent and ask God to forgive us and promised that we would stand in unison on this and go forth. Thank God we didn't decide to get on any boats...lol, I had too:) But sometimes I think life circumstances or reasoning can be your whale and it seems to swallow you whole.

We are not leaving because we want to, we are leaving because we have to obey. What I didn't know, at that time, is that my husband was being called to preach. This man that I petitioned before the Lord just years before to save him and allow him to get his life right with Him was being called. I have no doubt that he will be great, not because he is my husband but because he allows God to lead him.

When we decided to stand on faith and stop making excuses we felt like a huge load was lifted off of our shoulders. I am calling it blind faith for the moment because we still aren't positive as to where God is calling us. We had to fulfill our obligations first. I never felt like we should leave things undone. Too many people had promised to stay and fulfill an obligation and left in the middle of it and I never felt right about that.

So where do we go from here? Well, we have a church that is on our hearts and we feel like we are being led to go there. We shall see this Sunday when we go visit. We will be fasting and praying for direction again as we begin this journey. We are a little scared and even little more excited to see what God has in store for us. I ask you to pray for us to be sensitive to what He has to say and where He leads us...thank you!

2 comments:

momto8 said...

Keep the faith!! He will lead you.

Anonymous said...

I stumbled on your page by accident....but I have to tell you that I am so very impressed with your devotion to our Lord! Your story of the conviction you were under to leave your home church and venture out under faith and trust in the Lord, is awesome!
I am so encouraged by your telling of how you petitioned the Lord for your husband's salvation, because I, too, have been praying for my husband for 31 years. As you can see, I am much, much older than you. I will be thinking of you and I am praying right now that the Lord will give you both direction in what He wants of you, to serve Him. God bless you both!
Joy Dollar
Alabama
tkgrands@aol.com